Everyone is unique, growing up in a similar yet greatly nuanced environment. As a result friction may arise between two individuals. This is due to the fact that our minds are shaped according to how we are brought up. How we interpret information, how we express ourselves, how we perceive value are all the products of our childhood environment.
Last semester, I experienced conflict with one of my friend. When I was reorganising the contacts in my instant messenger account, I deleted one of my friend’s contact by accident. She then sent me a message, enquiring so. Realising my mistake, I added her back and apologised.
She informed me she still cannot see my “invitation.” I tried to re-add but with no success. After multiple attempts to rectify, I suspect the problem with the server. I informed her to wait for a while for this change to take effect. According to her, she still could not see the “invitation” on her side. She then gave me a remark which was something like “…so am I supposed to lay a red carpet for you (to add me)?”
That remark angered me. I never replied.
Sometimes, people fall out over the most insignificant things like an instant messenger account. I agree that the both of us were frustrated about the inability to add a contact. However, I feel one should not jump to conclusions and accuse, when the other person is not at fault. It would be better to practice patience and seek understanding of the situation first before passing a judgement.
What do you think?
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Effective communication and I
In life, everyone has their own set of problems. As for me, one of the problems I encountered is this inability to express myself properly. This is a very problematic issue if not solved. If I can master this art of effective communication, I hope it can improve the way I communicate or express myself. This is because, this is also one very important aspect of interpersonal skills, which I will have to employ throughout my life.
There are numerous times when I wanted to say something but in the end, I decided to just keep quiet and stay low. At that point of time, usually my thoughts will be "Ah, I think there is no point in me speaking up. I shall just keep quiet for now." There are also times where I was in a middle of something when another person just cuts into my conversation, hijacking it, leaving me with a topic I cannot wrap up. When this happens, after seeing everyone diverting their interest to this abrupt insertion, I did not feel like continuing my initial conversation anymore. I usually end up just sitting there, listening quietly or occupying myself with something that allowed me to stay low.
This is problematic as there may be ideas that I really want to share but is restricted by the way I put it across. In addition, it had a negative impact on the me as repeated failures eroded my confidence and the relationship between. Soon, I realised I was becoming more introverted and was less active (or vocal) during conversations. Thereafter, when I meet someone new, I became afraid to forge close bonds with them, as it pains me to see this new friendship fade out eventually.
This is because I treasure my relationship with my friends.
Although I do have a bunch of really good friends to whom I feel really comfortable with, who really understood me even without me saying anything, I cannot restrict my world to only these few people. The reason behind is because when I enter the workforce, I will have to meet a lot of different people and work together with them. If I cannot get my points across, if I cannot make my voice heard, then I will be no different than a piece of dead weight, weighing down the whole organisation. I hate it when I become a burden to others.
Talking about working with a lot of people, effective communication will prevent or minimise any potential misinterpretations of information. It will also be extremely useful in resolving potentially heated conflicts which may lead to disastrous endings. It will allow me to work more efficiently as well as I can understand exactly what is required of me.
Effective communication is one of the various soft skill that is good to be equipped with. Although I cannot say having such skills will definitely lead to a more fulfilling life, at least I am in a better position to review myself again and improve on my flaws.
There are numerous times when I wanted to say something but in the end, I decided to just keep quiet and stay low. At that point of time, usually my thoughts will be "Ah, I think there is no point in me speaking up. I shall just keep quiet for now." There are also times where I was in a middle of something when another person just cuts into my conversation, hijacking it, leaving me with a topic I cannot wrap up. When this happens, after seeing everyone diverting their interest to this abrupt insertion, I did not feel like continuing my initial conversation anymore. I usually end up just sitting there, listening quietly or occupying myself with something that allowed me to stay low.
This is problematic as there may be ideas that I really want to share but is restricted by the way I put it across. In addition, it had a negative impact on the me as repeated failures eroded my confidence and the relationship between. Soon, I realised I was becoming more introverted and was less active (or vocal) during conversations. Thereafter, when I meet someone new, I became afraid to forge close bonds with them, as it pains me to see this new friendship fade out eventually.
This is because I treasure my relationship with my friends.
Although I do have a bunch of really good friends to whom I feel really comfortable with, who really understood me even without me saying anything, I cannot restrict my world to only these few people. The reason behind is because when I enter the workforce, I will have to meet a lot of different people and work together with them. If I cannot get my points across, if I cannot make my voice heard, then I will be no different than a piece of dead weight, weighing down the whole organisation. I hate it when I become a burden to others.
Talking about working with a lot of people, effective communication will prevent or minimise any potential misinterpretations of information. It will also be extremely useful in resolving potentially heated conflicts which may lead to disastrous endings. It will allow me to work more efficiently as well as I can understand exactly what is required of me.
Effective communication is one of the various soft skill that is good to be equipped with. Although I cannot say having such skills will definitely lead to a more fulfilling life, at least I am in a better position to review myself again and improve on my flaws.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Hello Everyone!
Yea. Sorry for the sudden change. The previous blog service provider required everyone to be "registered users" in order to comment and I cannot find ways around it. So I had to take down the earlier blog.
I have a previous google account that was tied to blogger. Initially, I wanted to set up the ES2007S blog on blogger as well, so that everyone will have the same service provider. This will reduce any possible incompatibilities. However, when I tried to do so on Monday 16/08/2010, blogger insisted on my contact details, citing account verification as a reason.
Leaving personal contact information in the hands of google is dangerous.
Despite trying many times, this problem persisted. After feeling quite frustrated, I made the jump to Xanga.
Today, when Ms Lim highlighted the problem to me, I decided to try my luck with blogger on a different computer.
Somehow, it worked.
So YAY. Back on blogger.
Once again, thank you very much Ms Lim for highlighting this problem to me. I did not know Xanga had this limitation.
I have a previous google account that was tied to blogger. Initially, I wanted to set up the ES2007S blog on blogger as well, so that everyone will have the same service provider. This will reduce any possible incompatibilities. However, when I tried to do so on Monday 16/08/2010, blogger insisted on my contact details, citing account verification as a reason.
Leaving personal contact information in the hands of google is dangerous.
Despite trying many times, this problem persisted. After feeling quite frustrated, I made the jump to Xanga.
Today, when Ms Lim highlighted the problem to me, I decided to try my luck with blogger on a different computer.
Somehow, it worked.
So YAY. Back on blogger.
Once again, thank you very much Ms Lim for highlighting this problem to me. I did not know Xanga had this limitation.
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